lordzuuko:

ok but seriously keith is just so aesthetically pleasing to look at. whoever designed him, i give you kudos. thank you for putting the perfect lines to create this wonderful man we know today as keith kogane.

lovelyladylunacy:

there’s something really cute about how girls have a habit of trying to make anything difficult into a pleasant experience. like my new roommates just planned to get together to discuss contracts, but immediately suggested we do it with movies and nail-painting and chocolate. my friends and i used to dress up and do fun makeup for our exams. whenever my mom took me to doctors appointments when i was a kid, she’d brush my hair and put it up with lots of cute clips. girls are always trying to make things softer, or reduce the everyday stress in life. it’s such a nice way to be.

thesylverlining:

• Walk in on parents having a heated debate.
• Am worried for a bit. Are they fighting?
• Realize parents are having a heated debate on whether or not goats can climb trees.
• Immediately side with mom, because I know goats can fuckin climb fucking ANYTHING because I remember the “crave that mineral” meme with the goat on the vertical cliff face apparently levitating to achieve the mineral it craves.
• who fuckin says the internet never taught me anything
• Dad has to leave to go back to work. Leaves convinced that no, goats can’t climb trees, they’re goats, they stay on the ground.
• Once he’s gone, youtube search “Moroccan Tree Goats.” Find self-explanatory video of several goat up in a fuckin tree like some Dr. Seuss shit.
• Mom looks at me like it’s the proudest she’s ever been of me in her life, including my university graduation
• She emails it to him. At work. My dad will get a video of Moroccan goats screaming in a tree at his place of business, with the subject line “I TOLD YOU SO.”
• Mom triumphantly yells to the empty house, “THIS IS WHY PEOPLE IN THE BIBLE THOUGHT GOATS WERE THE DEVIL.”
• Another ordinary day in my house.

bellonanj73:

an-avaar-skald-and-bearsark:

izunamii:

the-scarecrow-of-aus:

artkat:

graemoon:

avidreaderffn:

dystopian-boobpocalypse:

sweetlyminiaturesublime:

k-lionheart:

ralkana:

alykat86:

bittyblueeyes:

nominanescio:

joestoyes:

unironicallyenthusiasticknitter:

dafezgirl:

thomas-is-so-vine-and-kind:

“really?” I say to inanimate objects that are not working like they usually do

“Stay.” I glare at inanimate objects that continuously fall over

“Thank you!” I say exhasperatedly to the inanimate objects when they do finally work right/stay put

“Sorry! I say to the table I bumped into

“SHHH” I say to the inanimate object that keeps making noise

“Yeah, yeah, I’m coming,” I huff at the persistent kitchen timer.

“Don’t take that tone with me!” I exclaim at objects that make strange and sudden unknown noises.

“Stop crying, you’re fine,” I snap as I’m looking for the charger cord for the electronic device beeping demandingly at me.

“Oh nice, real mature,” I snarl at devices that suddenly stop working after I berate them for not working properly.

JESUS CHRIST I HAVE NEVER RELATED SO HARD IN MY LIFE

I feel like if any of y’all got cursed into The Beast, you’d probably take the whole “furniture is alive” part pretty well in stride

“Easy there, easy, come on you can do it” I tell the printer every time I need to print something in a hurry. The trick is not to let it smell your fear.

“Seriously?” I ask, equal parts exasperated and frustrated, when an object falls over as soon as my back is turned.

“Nice, dude!” I chirp sarcastically at a whole pile of things after they’ve tumbled to the floor.

“Work damn you! I know the moneys in there so you have no excuse to not work”
I say glaring at the atm or other electronic banking device.

“Well fuck you too!” I snap at my computer as it freezes up for the fourth time in 15 minutes.

“I am THIS CLOSE to applying the Rite of Percussive Maintenance.” I  instruct my electronics when they continually refuse to function

And people look at you weird when you are ‘caught in the act’ of yelling at the naughty instruments.

“That’s a good girl.”–talking to the really unreliable copy machine when it completes a job without jamming.